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Episode Summary

Much of the work that exists on changing someone’s behavior focuses on the psychology of persuasion and nudging.

Persuasion asks this question: What are the things I can say and how can I say them to convince someone to do what’s best for them (or what I want them to do)?

Nudging asks a similar question: What are the things I can do, design or engineer to make someone more likely to follow a desired action?

But, our endless pursuit of these tactics often leaves behind one of the simplest and most effective ingredients to change someone’s behavior. An ingredient that often eliminates the need for persuasion and nudging.

What is it? Trust.

An unwavering, unparalleled level of trust makes changing someone’s behavior second-nature.

Think about someone you have that level of trust with. Now, imagine they ask you to do something. Do you immediately start brainstorming and researching all the possible nuances as to why they might be wrong?

No, of course not. Your brain is at ease when talking with someone you trust, and it’s natural defense-mechanism is turned off when you feel that kind of connection with someone.

Of course, the reason that trust functions as such a powerful force in changing behavior is because it’s difficult to build and earn that level of trust with someone.

The formula for unwavering trust has many dimensions, but sitting at the core is connection and communication. And, if you can get get those two right, you’ll have paved your way to the trust you need to change behavior.

Dr. Joy Lere has spent her entire career focusing on how to communicate and connect with someone in a way that builds trust and can change behavior.

Things You’ll Learn

  • Things you can do to create “space” for someone to open up and share more information than they do with most people
  • How to distinguish between “presenting issues” and the real issue someone is grappling with
  • How to read body language and posture and effective ways to address it
  • What Joy would tell herself 10 years ago about how to get better at reading people, asking questions and listening
  • How to understand whether someone wants you to be present and listen or to solve their problem (Do you “feel” it or “fix” it?)
  • Signs and signals to know whether someone is experiencing anxiety in the moment and how to handle it
  • A powerful questioning technique to get someone to make changes
  • The two points in time during your life that have the biggest impact on your current beliefs and behaviors around money

About Dr. Joy Lere

Dr. Joy Lere is a licensed clinical psychologist and behavioral finance consultant who works at the intersection of Freud and Finance in Napa, CA.

In her clinical work, she helps individuals who know the right answers overcome the obstacles and patterns holding them back on the path to change. On the finance side, she helps shatter silence about money, overcome financial anxiety, and conquer any other psychological challenge that money may present.

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